Yuck!

So, nothing really went according to plan this weekend. I was feeling like crap, and my dad is NOT a morning person, so I decided to skip the gym while in Chicago. I did alright with food on Thursday and Friday. Unfortunately, sitting in class all day means very little activity. My steps were pathetic. I think right now, for today, I have more steps than I did Friday, Saturday and Sunday combined. Pitiful. Saturday I was good with food until dinner. Sunday was just a mess any way you look at it! lol.

The scale showed me where I messed up. Today I weighed in at 217.4, so that sucks, but I'm back at it. Today is going to be a bit of a struggle. After work I have to get to the grocery store. I can't make dinner until I shop. So dinner will be late. My husband did not do much in terms of keeping the house clean, so that's another job for tonight.

On the bright side, I think I'm doing great with the smoking. So, yay me!

Have a great Monday!

1 month in :)

So, it's been a month. And here's my update.

I love getting my workout in in the morning. It is the best start to my day. I started this journey at 231.6 pounds, and today I weighed in at 215.2. That is a total loss of 16.4 pounds in one month. Unbelievable! It's nice to look at it that way instead of the "I have x amount left to go."

So, a few changes I've made along the way.

-I let myself have treats, I just limit them. For instance, this peanut butter pie has been creeping in to my lunch, but I have such a tiny sliver, it really isn't that much of a dent in my day. Plus, it will be gone soon.

-I steadily increase my workouts. Like, yes, right now I'm doing 5 miles in the am, but sometimes I get to 5 and I'm at like 587 calories burned, so I keep going until 600, so then I end up with like 5.12 miles. So, the 5.5 next week shouldn't feel like too much more. I sure do wish the shows were the exact time it took though. I hate ending in the middle of a show.

-I am trying not to snack big in the afternoon. I get needing something substantial in the morning but in the afternoon, it's really about boredom or needing something to break up the day.

I've got a gnarly cold right now, so I've been going to bed at like 8 pm. Which is wonderful! I just wish we as people needed less sleep. If 4:30 is when I have to get up to get in a workout, then I have to get to bed early...well, that's fine in the winter when outside sucks, but other than making dinner, there isn't much time to do much of anything if I'm going to bed at 8:30-9.

Oh well.

It's going to be a busy and stressful couple of days with this class in Chicago.

I'll check back in on Monday! Have a great weekend!

I'm so tired!

So, I'm not feeling the best. There seems to be some sort of cold that is going around. My husband and I both woke up yesterday feeling icky. But I'm pushing through. I meant to start this whole healthy thing back in December, but 3 days after I got married, I got a cold....and it lasted over a month! YUCK!

I just started feeling better about 3 weeks ago, so I really hope this one comes and goes and I can get on with my life!

On the bright side, when my husband isn't feeling good, he doesn't put up a fight about going to bed early! We were in bed before 8:30 last night. It was amazing!!!

I had a good day yesterday. Adding in that half a mile really helps with my steps and calories burned for the day. So, I did great on my budget, got in my steps, and today, I weighed in at 215.2. I've lost just over 16 pounds! Woot woot!

There is no way I can break my streak now!

I am still stressed about the next few days. Tonight I have to cook dinner, pick up a prescription from the pharmacy, do some laundry, and pack what I can for my weekend away. I plan to leave tomorrow after work, well, shortly after work. Because I will still have to come home, grab my stuff, and pack the last of what I couldn't before.

I hate driving at night and alone! So, that should be horrible. haha

I'm glad to be taking the class, but I'm upset my husband can't come along, and I'm upset that it will mean little time to relax and unwind while I'm up there. Oh well! It must be done!

Here's to hoping the meds get me through the day, and this cold disappears.

What a difference!

So, I'm not really sure how to make sense of it, but oh well. As of yesterday, I increased my activity from 4.5 miles in the morning to 5 miles in the morning. And my fitbit adjustment through LoseIt went up about 100....but somehow, and I'm sure the math and logic are there, but it's still strange, by the time I ate dinner, I had zeroed out all the calories I had eaten throughout the day. Very strange! But pretty awesome really!

I just got back from the gym, got another 5 miles it. It feels good! I'm down to 216.8 today, so that's wonderful! So far, that's just over 14 pounds lost, and it's just under a month! I'm doing great on my water intake. I'm way over 110 oz a day. I haven't really felt like skipping the gym yet, I don't press snooze or anything. So, that helps! And, it's been COLD. I can't wait for when I don't have to warm up my car in the morning, and for when it's not black out until after my shower....Bring on spring!

That's all for today! Keep up the good work :)

Not too shabby!

Okay, so, this weekend wasn't quite what I was expecting it to be, but I'm going to call it a win. I got over 10,000 each day. And, I got to enjoy some treats. Now, I feel kind of like I over indulged, but also, I was only over in calories on Sunday, and only by 322, so that's not horrible. I went to the gym on Saturday, got in my 4.5 miles, had sensible food, went to the movies and let myself enjoy a pretzel and popcorn, had a good dinner. Sunday, I took my rest day from the gym, so I did make it there 6 of the  days again. We went out to eat, and breakfast was delicious. The bad part is that I had corned beef hash with 2 eggs and toast. That meal alone totaled 925. It was a bit of a late breakfast, so I didn't eat again until dinner. I know, not good. Dinner was good, healthy. It was after dinner that killed me. If I had stuck to the 2, I would have been fine. I then had some of that pesty banana bread. Even that alone would have been fine. But then, my husband brought out the peanut butter pie. I was a goner. It was sooooo good. It had about 600 calories per piece, and I had a full piece. So, that's what put me over the edge. Saturday I weighed in the same as Friday, but Sunday I was actually down to 217.8, but then today I was up to 218.6. Now, I'm sure that's because I ate so late. There is no way that being over 1 day by 300 calories made me gain almost a pound. I'm guessing it's just because the food is still in my body...Oh well! I killed it at the gym this morning.

I am stressing out about this week though. Monday-Wednesday will be fine. But Thursday, I head to Chicago. I'm hoping I can get my dad to pick up some soup for when I get into town. I love this soup (egg lemon drop) from this diner in town that is only there on Thursdays. Fingers crossed. Unfortunately, I won't get into town until like 8 pm. YUCK! It's Friday, Saturday and Sunday I worry about. There is a gym there I can head to, but from my dad's house, it's about 15-20 minutes away. And the class I'm heading to is probably about 20 minutes away from his house too. So that means if I want to stick to my schedule, I may have to get up closer to 4 am. I'm also not sure if he has coffee at his house, which may kill me. Haha. That will be Friday and Saturday that I have to do that. Friday I'm going to dinner with grandma. Eating out again. Both days, I likely have to get lunch near my class. Eating out again. Then Sunday, if I skip the gym, I'm going to be in the car for 2ish hours. So that means once I get back to my house, I have to find a way to walk a lot. That also means I'll have to leave pretty early. I've already decided that Saturday will be my cheat night because I'm meeting up with an old friend :)

Hopefully I'm building this all up to be bigger than it will be. I just need to focus on my goal, and the rest will fall into place. Stupid sitting!  Why does everything involve sitting.

This is also a warning. My dad doesn't have internet, so no posts Friday-Sunday.

As of February 5th, I will have been watching my weight for a month. It will not have been working out the whole time though, so we will see what my month total loss is!

How was your weekend? Good? Bad? Not going to talk about it?

Have a great Monday!

Staying strong!

Sometimes everything seems like more than you can handle, and I know with me, the first thing to suffer is usually myself. For instance, let's say there is just crap going on at home....well, I usually make sure all of that is attended to and skip the stuff I worry about for me. But, this time I'm not. Sitting here, I can see crumbs on the kitchen counter, the dishwasher needs unloaded, there is a load of laundry done in the dryer that needs folded and put away, the table has miscellaneous stuff that I need to find a place for, and the kitchen floor is muddy from the dogs. Now, in the past, I would have stayed up last night to make sure this was all taken care of before I went to bed. Staying up means I wouldn't have been able to get up this morning for the gym. But I didn't. I need to remember that I am important. I still think it absolutely sucks that I need to get up at 4:30 to have some me time, to make being healthy fit into my life, but oh well. So be it. It doesn't hurt anything to let the dirtiness wait a day. It will hurt a lot if I don't take care of myself!

I've done good the past couple of days. I couldn't write yesterday because I had a doctors appointment at 7:30. This is the first time I can think of that the doctor hasn't commented on my weight. Not that it's in a safe place, but that they were focused on other aspects. I'm going to be quitting smoking, so I got Chantix. I'm excited.

Today I weighed in at 218.0. Not too shabby! I like it when I lose weight. Makes the work and not snacking seem worth it.

I'm worried about today a bit. We are going out to eat for lunch as an office. Let's pray I can pick something not bad for you. And that I don't overeat. We also have to pick up my stepdaughter about an hour away after work. I assume both my husband and I are going, but I'm not completely sure. That being said, we are to meet them around 6 pm. That means we have to leave at 5. I get off work at 4:45 and it takes me about 15 minutes to get home. From there, we have to leave immediately. No time to eat. Then it's an hour drive there and an hour drive back. We will get home around 7-8. That's awfully late to be eating dinner. My alternative is to get something while on the road. Probably not a lot of healthy options there either. OI OI OI!

Temptation wise, I need this banana bread to disappear. It calls my name at night. Haha!  It's just that I like something sweet after a meal. I need to get jelly beans. That way I can have like 4 jelly beans, calories will be low, and I will satisfy the sweet tooth. Now, where to hide them so everyone else doesn't jack them?

I'm excited to go shopping tomorrow because I have the lists from the new cookbooks. I really hope we find some recipes we love!!

I am planning to get up at 6 tomorrow, maybe 5:30, so I can get up and still do my routine. We have my stepdaughter, so there will be some family time stuff. We need to do some housework. I have to shop. I have an oil change appointment at 9 am. I may be showing a few houses. It's going to be a busy Saturday. It's also supposed to snow Saturday night into Sunday, with and expected 4-6+ inches...so, who knows what will be in store.

Have a great weekend!

Don't go it alone!

If you ask me, one of the most important things in any journey is having a support system. They can be pretty hard to come by. You'd like to think the people closest to you would be the ones you could rely on, but often times, that is not the case. If you think about it, it makes sense. If they were on the same page as you are with your goals, would you have ended up where you are?

Here's an example of what I mean. I would love for my husband to be my biggest supporter in my weightloss journey. I love him. He'se here for me. We can do it together. Let's be honest, he could use some exercise too. Who couldn't? But when I ask him to come to the gym, he'd rather sleep. When I ask him for input on foods, he chooses usually unhealthy things, or even finds a way to make a healthy recipe not so healthy. But it makes complete sense. This is how I got to where I am today. Together, we chose to sit around instead of be active. Together we ordered pizza instead of cooking. Together we finished off that cake. So, although I have decided to change my outlook, my goals and my ways of doing things, that doesn't mean he has to or wants to. Sure, if I only cook healthy stuff and don't give him a choice, he's going to have to eat it. But this isn't his journey. He is used to and presumably likes the way things were (even though he says he wants to lose weight too), but he hasn't had his wake up call yet. It hasn't hit him. And I shouldn't look to him to be my only support system because he's not in a place to do that yet.

That's where this lovely internet comes in handy. Now, sure, it sucks when I want someone to take a Zumba class with me, or I want a friend who knows what I'm going through to go to the movies with so I don't overload on popcorn and soda. But on the internet, I can find groups, friends, recipes, exercise recommendations, you name it. My support system is unlimited. All you have to do is look, and you can find someone to be your personal cheerleader. But don't forget, you are your own team. You decide how this ends. You have the control. You can do it!

Yesterday was a decent day. No change in weight. I have not done the miles at night. Not sure why. I guess just feeling tired at the end of the day. Well actually, I think it's because I've been watching tv with my husband at night. And when I get on the mini elliptical, he thinks I have a ton of energy, so he wants to go on a walk (in the cold), which I do not. Those walks last too long and I hate getting bundled up for them. 1 mile in my house is only about 15 minutes, and I can do it in my pajamas and moccasins.

I was also coerced into making banana bread last night. It was yummy, but I shouldn't have had any. I hope he takes it to work today. Haha!

3 of my 4 new cookbooks filled with one dish recipes arrived last night! I can't wait to pick out some recipes for the next couple of weeks!

Have a great Wednesday!

Don't get ahead of yourself

I don't know if you're like me or not, but I'm constantly getting ahead of myself. I psych myself out about things weeks away and that will quite possibly change and/or are out of my control.

For instance, I'm likely taking a class in the Chicagoland area the weekend of February 7th. That being said, I'm worried about having to sit in a classroom all day on the weekends (usually my most active days) as well as trying to make it to the gym before the class (meaning I don't get to spend the time with my family/friends that I had hoped to). I'm also worried about having to buy food for lunch those days. And on that Sunday, after sitting in class all day, I will be sitting in a car for 2 hours back home. Sure, planning ahead is great, and it gives me a chance to come up with solutions to the problems I see, but really, I don't need to make myself anxious over it. It will turn out.

I did very good yesterday! I was right on par with my water and my food. I did 4.5 miles in the am, but I didn't get my mile in in the evening. I'll try to make it up over the course of the week. I'm back down to 219.2, so that was a relief.

I'll tell you, I really want it to be spring so that I can get outside. I just don't like being outside when I have to bundle up to do so.

In general, I feel stressed out about almost everything. Time, money, work, the real estate courses, family stuff...You name it and I'm worrying about it. Just breathe, right?! If only it were so easy. I really do like my morning work outs. It gives me some me time. Nobody else to get in my head. Nothing but me and my music. If only I didn't have to get up at 4:30 to fit it in.

Oh well!

Here's to a great Tuesday! Do something to be proud of!

This weekend's report!

Not quite what I had in mind.....


That pretty much sums up my weekend. How about you?

So, Friday, dinner was a fiasco. We ended up getting Chinese food. I didn't over eat in terms of the main dish, but those damn egg rolls. I couldn't resist.

So, I thought that would be my cheat meal for the week.

Then Saturday came. Now, I'm not really good at keeping my schedule on weekends. What that means is that I stay up later than usual, sleep in later than usual, and do not eat on any sort of schedule. Recipe for disaster!

I had plans on Saturday at 10 am, and my husband had plans as well. I woke up about 8 am, so there was no time to hit the gym before hand. I got ready, and me and my step-daughter went out with my cousin and family. It was fun. We went to their house for lunch. I chose not to eat it, thinking I'd be home soon enough and be able to eat something healthier. I was wrong. We had some errands to run, so we did. We didn't get home until about 3 or so. I was starving. At this time, my husband called me saying he was almost home and hungry too, so we ordered pizza. At that point, I had only had a piece of toast for the day. Bad me! So, I over indulged on pizza for sure. I also had cake, that I had made because Friday was my husband's birthday. It was not a small piece. I also had a couple of drinks. Talk about going over board. I never made it to the gym on Saturday. I forgave myself for that calling it my rest day. But the food was a terrible mistake.

Sunday we went to breakfast at my in-laws house. I did good on portions since it was biscuits and gravy. Then, I got home and hit the gym. 5.5 miles on the elliptical. Woot woot! I did laundry for the rest of the day, along with some course work for my real estate license. I ate a sensible dinner around 4 and then a snack of some kashi cereal around 6.

I wasn't feeling too bad about my choices until this morning. My weigh in was 221.4. That's a 2.4 pound gain from Friday morning. This is why I choose to weigh myself every day. I need to get on that for the weekends. If I would have gotten up early Saturday and seen the result of the salty Chinese food, I would have perhaps made better choices on Saturday in terms of activity and food.

My take away from this weekend is that everything counts. I could have had pizza or a drink or a small piece of cake, but any of them should have been done in moderation, and only one of them...not all 3. In order to keep up with my progress, I need to stick to a schedule. Maybe not get up at 4:30 on weekends, but maybe like 6. That would allow me to still get my exercise in without hindering our family plans. Regardless, I do not want to watch this happen again. I let my surroundings dictate my actions, and my will was not strong.

I did manage to get some before pictures taken.

 

In my opinion, these are entirely too similar to my old before pictures. Makes me so sad.

 

Wins for the weekend: making it to the gym Sunday, following my food plan Sunday, and I finished my online reading for my real estate license.

 

I did make it to the gym this morning. This week it is 4.5 miles in the morning with another 1 mile at night :)

 

 

 

 

My plan

When I decided to start this blog, I really hadn't made a plan for what I wanted to talk about, so it's kind of like a journal-just whatever comes to mind. But, I do want to keep you all posted on my progress. I invite and encourage you to comment with yours as well!

So, here's how this week has gone so far:

I've made it to the gym every day (Monday-Friday), and have done at least 4 miles on the elliptical each morning. I'm reading for my Real Estate Brokers exam, so if I'm in the middle of a test or a page, I stay on a little longer to finish it.

Tuesday was the only day I did not hit my water goal, but I was still close.

I have stayed under my allotted calories every day this week (even with going out for drinks last night!) I was so proud because instead of ordering a fried appetizer, we got the hummus and pita. :)

I have crushed my step goal of 10,000 every day this week. On Tuesday, I was over 20,000 steps. Woot woot!

I have managed to walk at least 1 mile every night as well (some were not on the elliptical).

Things I did that I knew were changes from my past behaviors were:

-Ordering the hummus and pita (never thought I'd ask for that in a restaurant)
-Walking to and from the bar that I met my friend at last night to be able to fit in my evening walk
-I actually made it to bed by 9:30 pm every day. I would like to be in bed by 9 though. That is always my goal, but I easily give in to other people, but this week I didn't!

Things I'm not so proud of were:

-I ended up having 4 drinks last night. They just tasted so good. And they were small. I really wish I was better at doing things in moderation. I should have just had 1 (maybe 2).

Last Friday I weighed in at 223.6, and today I am 219.0. That is a 4.6 pound loss for one week. Not too shabby if I do say so myself. A total of 12.6 pounds lost since I started!

Tonight I want to take before pictures. I know it's not the true beginning, but it's something!

I am debating whether or not to skip the gym Sunday. I know you are supposed to have rest days, but I  feel bad when I don't make it. So, I have to think about that one. Plus, I'm not sure that we have any plans to do anything Sunday. My step-daughter will be with us, and it's supposed to be a bit colder, so I don't know that I can get us to go on a long walk outside. Maybe I'll head to the gym and just walk for a long time....who knows.

Starting Sunday or Monday, my new goal is to do 4.5 miles on the elliptical in the morning. I will keep with the 1 mile at night. By the end of this, I want to work myself up to 10 miles a day. This will mean less morning me time and a good portion of the evening. But, by the time I get there, it should be the summer, so if I can get my mornings up to like 7 or 8 miles (which I think is doable), it would only be like 2-3 at night. If I get the family to go for a 1-2 mile walk at night, I should be able to get the other mile in on my mini elliptical.

And once I hit 170, I want to start doing weights too. Not sure how that will work with time. Hopefully my husband gets behind me in this fitness frenzy and can understand if I need to run to the gym after work for half an hour to get it in. Maybe I can find some weights for the house too. Who knows!

I have a much easier time keeping on being active all day on the weekends because I'm not stuck at my desk for 7 hours during the day, so I'm not too worried about what this weekend has in store! I'll do my best to keep you in the loop :)

Goals

What are your goals, and how do you plan to reward yourself?


I think having outlines for both of these things are very important. You see, how I see it, is if your only goal is to lose 90 pounds, and your reward is only the fact that you did it, you are probably going to fail.

We all like to be rewarded. There is no point in denying it. You do good at work, you want recognition or money...You get all the laundry done at the house, you want to be thanked. Regardless of what you accomplish, you want some sort of gratification for doing it. So, as long as you are completely in control, make it happen. Don't look for someone else to be proud of you and reward you for your personal goals....it's not that important to them.

So, as for my goals, I have them set up all over the place...with built in rewards for the small ones and not so built in on the big ones! I also make them all dependent on me, not the results. You'll see what I mean.

Each week, I plan to work out 6 of the 7 days. If I accomplish this, I reward myself with a bubble bath on Sunday night with a glass of wine. Notice that I didn't put a weight on it, like if I lose 3 pounds each week, I get to..... because losing weight sucks, and there are going to be days and weeks where you are spot on, but the scale doesn't budge. Don't beat yourself up. You are doing what you can, and you should recognize that for yourself.

Also, and this one may sound silly, but if I don't get up and go to the gym, I don't let myself put on lotion that day. Part of it, I guess, is like I don't deserve it, but really, I love lotion, and I need to do it everyday, so I've made it part of my workout ritual.

I also have the goal to find healthy and easy recipes for my whole family. I'm sooo excited about this one. I'm getting them to join me on this healthy journey, and they don't even have to do anything! I've discovered that I love one dish meals, so I just ordered 4 cookbooks that have these healthy recipes. As long as I keep up with this, the reward is building my recipe collection and making my family healthy....kind of a boring one.

I do have some weight based goals too. Like once I lose 50 pounds, I will definitely need new clothes. So there is a shopping spree there! Same with once I hit my goal weight. According to LoseIt, that should be on December 8th, so right before my birthday! What a great gift to myself :)

Also, if I follow my eating guidelines (not a diet-a change of lifestyle), I will allow myself one "cheat meal" a week. It's important to remember that this should not be a cheat day...and I still want to log the food I eat. DO NOT KEEP YOURSELF FROM EATING THINGS YOU LIKE! You just have to do it in moderation. Like last Sunday, we were celebrating a birthday, and I made a cake that had 588 calories per slice....WOW. So I was careful the rest of the day, and when cake time came around, I only ate half a piece. That's a fair compromise! 

Money usually seems to be an issue, so my rewards tend not to be a purchase. Sure, I'd love to be able to buy a new outfit every time I lost 10 pounds, but that's probably not in the cards. I do sometimes make my rewards something I need. I also have it set that once I get down to 190, I will buy new gym shoes. Silly? Maybe, but it works for me.

I hear of a lot of people that will reward a success by setting themselves up to fail. Food rewards are usually not the way to go. They can be if you do so with caution, but let's be honest, is that how you do it? Let's say you love Big Macs. Well, so, you hit your goal of 10 pounds, so you head to McDonald's and get the Big Mac meal. In that meal alone you are eating 1320 calories. I don't know about you, but that's just about my current calorie limit for the day.....and then either you need to work out like crazy just to negate it, or you're probably going to go up on the scale. You gain weight, you get discouraged....and you are on a downward spiral. Instead, maybe, make your own version of the big mac? I know there has to be a better way to make that secret sauce...and other than that, you can do it with a turkey burger, or not have the fries and/or soda..... Just use common sense. Eating bad food isn't going to make you feel better.

I prefer my goals and rewards to be event based. Like a walk at my favorite nature preserves, or letting myself have a girly movie night. And they can support each other. If you go for that walk, make yourself do 3 miles, 5 miles, whatever it is, and then let yourself have a lazy evening or something. You will feel so much better! If you don't have a fit bit or other activity tracking device, there are some great apps out there. Map My Walk (run, exercise, etc.) can be activated on your phone and use gps to track your route, miles, pace, elevation, etc. So, you will know just how hard you actually worked that day :)

In terms of weight goals, I think it's important to not give yourself strict date deadlines. Sure, aim for something, but life happens. There's going to be funerals and weddings and birthday parties and meals you are invited to. You aren't going to be able to control what is served or if there is a place for you to work out....keep yourself in check, don't gorge. You can still control how much you eat, but somethings are really out of your hands. So, you can't get discouraged if you didn't get your 10,000 steps in that day if you were in the car for 8 hours. Or if you couldn't get your time in on the elliptical if the hotel you were at had no work out facility. Just do the best you can, and if you know you put in your very best effort, recognize that for yourself!

Think about your goals. Make them something you can actually do. Write them down. Hold yourself accountable. Don't make excuses. You can do it!

My outline

What's your plan?


I am a planner-through and through. So, making a plan is easy. It's sticking with the plan that I find difficult. I was talking with a co-worker yesterday about maintaining. Now, I know I'm not at a point where I have to worry about maintaining; there is still a lot of losing to be done. But I do worry about it. I think that's where my problem came in last time. I'm either on it or I'm not. I can log everything and watch every calorie in and out, or I don't. I have a hard time balancing the two.

Now, my plan is this:

Work out at the gym 6 of the 7 days in a week; however, I still plan to take a nice walk or something on the 7th day. I use a fitbit. In case you don't know what that is, check it out. Fitbit.com. It's an amazingly fun gadget! So, it logs my steps, active minutes, water, etc. I don't particularly like their food logging and/or calorie budget/estimates, so for that I use loseit, which is an app that you can log all your food in. LoseIt seems to be more conservative with the estimates of what you should eat, and they let you scan barcodes on your food and pulls up the actual nutrition information for the food. It also lets you create food and recipes. So, I can go in, enter all the ingredients to make a pot of whatever, and then divide it by servings, so I know the calories per serving of my favorite recipes!

This week, I am doing 4 miles on the elliptical at the gym in the morning. I have to get up at 4:30, and I get to the gym by 5. This lets me be home by about 6, which gives me time to relax for a bit with my cup of coffee and then get in the shower. I then still have time to get ready for work, maybe throw in a load of laundry, and make my husband breakfast. I love the morning.

I make sure to eat a piece of toast with peanut butter before the gym. I read you should eat something with protein within 30 minutes of waking up. Since a big breakfast is the last thing on my mind at 4:30 am, the toast is the best I can do.

LoseIt updates how many calories I can eat based on how much I weigh that day, so I don't worry to figure it out myself. I do, however, try to stay around 1200, even when it says I can have more. And if I burn a ton of calories with activity, I try my best not to eat those. I'd rather a boost in the progress than a steady run.

This week, I have added in a mile at night. I have this tiny elliptical that I can do that on, if I don't want to go outside. I don't really like walking in the cold and/or dark....I can't wait for summer!

I am also trying to drink half my body weight in water ounces every day! It can be tough, and I spend a lot of time peeing!

So, that's the plan. And I'm great at sticking too it. Like I said, last time I did this, it was down to a science. Dinner every day was a chicken breast, a cup of brown rice and a cup of broccoli and/or cauliflower.

But what sucks is when other people don't understand or care about your plan. I have to be in bed by about 9 in order to be able to get up at 4:30 and actually function the next day. So, no, I don't want to start a show at 8:30. I have to get ready for bed. And no, I don't want to grab pizza. I don't have the calories left to eat it. It sucks to get that look, like, oh, shut up about your calories, you are obsessed and crazy. I may be, but if I want results, I have to watch what I'm doing. Grabbing the fast food is what got me to where I am. I need to do this for me! Please don't make me feel bad for it.

Some things give me such anxiety when I'm trying to watch everything....like being asked to go out for a drink. In my head, I think, okay, I can allot 200 calories for this trip, so I can only get one drink, basically, and then I'm no fun. Or restaurants. Sure, I can order the chicken breast and fresh veggies, but who wants to pay for that at a restaurant? Not me, bring on the bacon cheeseburger. Buffets suck. There is no way to eat well there. And snacks at work...I appreciate them, but I really didn't have it in my plan. Same with office lunches where I don't pick what I get. Now, I'm not complaining; It really is sweet of them to do that for me. I just didn't have it in my plan.

How do you deal with these surprises? Are you as type A as I am? It's very difficult. And as much as I hate the looks when I turn someone down for something, or the attitude about having to keep my schedule, but I hate even more when there isn't a choice.

Hopefully I will lean to deal with these as they come. I'm trying, this time around, to be more flexible. To plan ahead for the disruptions of my plan, to make up for extra calories with extra activity instead of giving up on the day, to understand that not everyone is on my plan and it can't always go my way, and to find ways to make the plan work when life is still happening around me. Last time I did this, I lived alone, there was no other schedules to follow, no time lines in place, no distractions, so a set meal plan worked....but now, I'm married, I have my husband, step-daughter, and 3 dogs to work into my schedule, I'm working on furthering my career, and I'm trying to show everyone, including myself, that it is possible to do this and still have a life. I've always thought that if I could be locked in a boot camp like on the biggest loser where people make my food and my only job was to work out, sure, I'd kill it too, but what one of these shows needs to show is that it can be done by anyone, in any situation. This is my attempt to show it to the world!

Introductions!

Let's get started!


Okay, so there are a lot of things that come to mind when I think about trying to lose weight. It's not easy....seriously. That's probably number one. Go ahead, look at me, you're thinking, what does she know. Currently, I tip the scales at a whopping 221.6 pounds. I'm 5 foot 4, so that's pretty heavy. And honestly, I'm very disappointed that I've hit this spot. It's not my highest weight. That was 248, back in November of 2010. I never wanted to see that number again. So, I watched what I ate, turned into a working out robot, eating the same thing (it was way easier that way) everyday, and in about 10 months dropped down to 143 pounds. It was awesome. I felt like I was on top of the world. Now, here I am, about 3 and a half years later, almost at my highest weight again. How could I let that happen? I knew how much work was involved in losing the weight. I knew how much better I felt when I was thin and healthy. I honestly don't understand how I let myself do this to myself.

Well, it all stops now. Sure, I'm jumping on the band wagon of new year's resolutions to lose weight. Whatever. If it works for me, then I don't care if I'm a cliché. And I'm already seeing progress. As of January 5th, I started watching what I eat, making out meal plans, and logging all of my food. I lost about 3 pounds that week. As of January 12th, I started hitting the gym. My goal is 6 of the 7 days a week. I met that goal last week. That alongside watching my calories, I'm down a total of 10 pounds in 2 weeks. I've got this!

So, as things come to mind, I plan to share with you my journey. My struggles. My successes. My tips. My rants. My story.

Ready?

Here are my before and after pictures from my first go around....pretty astonishing if you ask me. I've also included a more recent picture so that I can have a basis for comparison.